CLASSIC DIAZ : KFC Meltdown (orig. 6.2.05)

(editor's note : I no longer live by this KFC location. I do however eat the shit out of fried chicken. Constantly. I had Popeye's last night.)

I live right around the corner from a Kentucky Fried Chicken/Pizza Hut. It's pretty awesome because they have delicious foods like Snackers, Popcorn Chicken and Country Fried Steak (wednesday only). As much as I love their delicious chicken and wonderful side dishes I cannot turn a blind eye to their incredibly poor service. And, it's not the whole KFC (affectionately pronounced "kifk") chain that's a problem. It's just this one location.

They are constantly on the verge of shutting down for good in my eyes.

Anytime I have ever gone in there the same scenario plays itself out. You wait on line for about 10 minutes before anyone even LOOKS at you. No exaggeration. I went with Ryan yesterday and he made 2 phone calls before they even took his order and we were the only people waiting. When he asked what the country fried steak looked like, the girl behind the counter WALKED AWAY and started to put together someone else's order. That someone else came up looking a little nervous and confused as to why she didn't have her food yet. It appeared she had been waiting for quite a while. Upon inspecting her food she realized that the mashed potatoes had been forgotten. It took her another full minute to get them. After that debacle, Ryan asked if the country fried steak was any good to which the girl responding with much vocal and facial attitude, "I don't know, I don't eat that shit". Ummm. Double u, tee, eff?

Finally it was my turn to order after a good 15 minutes of waiting to be acknowledged. I was informed, after requesting mac and cheese, they did not in fact have any. This is another ongoing probably at this location. No matter what you need they don't have it. Crispy Strips? 10 minute wait. Sausage Pizza? Not today. And, God forbid they need to go to that Snackers station and slap some lettuce, chicken and mayo on a bun. You may be collecting pension by the time you get it. I seriously have been told on several occasions that they didn't have certain items or, get this, no utensils. No utensils? Really? At a restaurant?

Keep in mind that we were the only people waiting when we got there. The only other people in the KFC were the two people who had probably been there for an hour before us waiting on their wrong order. It's not like they were bogged down with customers or they were doing drive thru orders. There were 4 people working the kitchen and 1 person who appeared to be cleaning. Somehow this translates into extended wait times and wrong orders. It's mind blowing.

You'd think with all this down time that at least the tables and stuff would be clean. Not a chance. There were crumbs everywhere and the two garbage cans were overflowing. 5 people and not one of them could take the time to clean the place, let alone fill the straw dispenser. When a friend asked for a straw the day before, the same attitude girl handed her a handful of straws and motioned towards the dispenser, basically making Lex do HER job!! Holy fucking amazing! The STRAWS were too much for her to handle!

So anyway.. we FINALLY get our food after waiting upwards of 20 minutes, and I must say it was damn delicious. You can't really beat $1.99 for CFS, mashed potatoes, wedges, and a biscuit. We noticed that quite a line had formed behind us and it was taking equally as long for these people to get their food. In fact the woman waiting behind me when I was ordering was STILL waiting for her food when we were finished eating. She continued to wait until we got up to leave, and then returned to the counter because something was missing...

This is not a one time thing. This is every time I'm in there. Without fail. It is easily the worst run fast food place in the history of possibly ever. I cannot believe I subject myself to this once a week. There are so many other places I could eat. I guess I'm just lazy.

I have no idea why I wrote this. I think I'm going to go over there in a few minutes.

I'm sorry KFC. I'm sorry I hurt your feelings.